Grandparents’ morning is a very special day in our calendar year. It is an opportunity for us to show our gratitude to these pillars of our community; the storytellers and the wisdom-providers.
The role of grandparents in today’s society is more important than ever. This generation has seen the fastest social shift in the history of human kind; a massive change to the concept of community over just a few decades. It used to be said that “it takes a village to raise a child”, however, people no longer know their neighbours. Instead, young people are joining online communities and being influenced by strangers they’ve never met and algorithms that are designed to snatch their attention.
The lure of digital devices and perceived societal pressure to give children as much freedom as possible can make bedtime and family mealtime routines a struggle for parents. However, we know that wisdom does not come from engaging with shallow, transient, online content. Neither does freedom come from doing whatever we want.
Freedom comes through the right balance of love and discipline. There is a beautiful analogy of a potter who throws a pot. As it turns on the wheel, the potter uses both hands to create the pot. The outer hand is the hand of discipline and the inner the hand of love. If there is only the inner hand then the pot will have no shape or structure, and with only the outer hand the pot will be unable to expand. In either of these imbalanced situations the pot will be unable to serve any useful purpose.
As mentioned earlier, grandparents are the wisdom-providers. With life experience comes an understanding of the importance of respect; the importance of simple measures in eating and sleeping, especially for young people; the importance of obedience; and the need to build resilience. Wisdom seems to be becoming a commodity in short supply in our modern society. Wisdom is a product of a quiet mind, and there is so much rush in today’s world that there is little opportunity for stillness and fine attention.
One of the best things grandparents do for children is to provide them with opportunities to experience the deep satisfaction that comes with attending to what is in front of them; providing them with activities that allow them to rest their attention.
“Rest your attention like you would rest your body—gently, without force, and with kindness. Let it settle, not strive.” — Unknown